My son recently graduated from high school and received some nice presents from relatives to celebrate his milestone. In return, he was supposed to write thank-you notes for the gifts he received. Sound familiar?

Well, one week led to the next and soon two months went by and no thank-you notes were written. After a lot of pressure from the parental units, he finally wrote them, but the impact won't be the same. It's the timeliness and the way gratitude is shown that makes a difference.

In yesterday's Promotional Consultant Today, we discussed gratitude in the workplace-who to thank and when to thank them. Today we share these simple tips for how to say thank you.

How To Thank

The words "thank you" are an adequate choice for acknowledging common courtesies shown to you. However, when people go beyond the basics, your recognition should as well. By following a few simple guidelines, you can quickly and easily step up your gratitude game.

Get specific: Focus on a detail, and your "thank you" will mean more. For instance, "The lemon muffins you made and brought into the office today were some of the best I've ever had. The glaze was amazing. You were so thoughtful to share them with us." That's a whole lot better than "Thanks for the muffins."

Get personal: Share with others how what they've done meant something to you, and your thanks will both seem and be more sincere. With a little thought, you can connect feelings to the most mundane topics. For example, "John, I wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed and appreciated your presentation this afternoon. I've struggled with using PowerPoint animations and never been able to get them to look professional. I learned a lot from watching what you did. You have real talent."

Great creative: Ironically, the phrase "thank you" hinders most people's ability to express gratitude effectively. Avoid using the phrase at the start of your sentences, and you'll find you are more imaginative. For instance, "Thank you for allowing me to attend today's meeting. I appreciate the opportunity to be included in the decision-making process." That's okay, but consider the following: "I learned a lot about the decision-making process at this meeting. I never understood how the committee system worked until today. It was real eye opener. I appreciate you allowing me to attend." Choice number two is stronger and it doesn't use the words "thank you" at all.

Get to your keyboard: Email is appropriate when a verbal thank you seems a bit inadequate or is not possible. Although you don't want to fill people's inboxes with unnecessary messages, recognize that for most folks, it is a pleasure to receive an occasional note of appreciation. Start typing.

Get out your stationery: If you really want to show your thanks, think "old school." These days, hand-written notes are few and far between, so when you take the time to craft one, it won't go unnoticed. Write at least three sentences using your best penmanship, focus on a detail, and tell your recipients how what they've done for you has made a difference.

So there you have it: the who, what and how of a good thank you. And at this point, if you are still reading, I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to consider these ideas. As you might imagine, it's great to feel as if what you have to say might be useful to someone. You've made my day. Thank you!

Source: Kate Zabriskie is the president of Business Training Works, Inc., a Maryland-based talent development firm. She and her team help businesses establish customer service strategies and train their people to live up to what's promised.